Casa Tua, Cuban, Florida, Fontainebleau, Liv, Miami, Psychic, South Beach, Spanish, Welcome to Miami

Welcome to Miami

 best me miami

   “Miami is a melting pot in which none of the stones melt. They rattle around.” – Tom Wolfe

Miami is the closest you are going to get to feel like you are in a different country while being in the United States. I took a weekend trip the first week of March and stayed at the Fontainebleau, one of the most luxurious beach front hotels in South Florida. Its grand pools, jacuzzis, day beds and spas make it hard to want to leave the resort. The waitresses and bartenders are gorgeous, as they mix drinks while grinding and free styling to house music blazing from the speakers. South beach has some of the most beautiful and surgically-perfected women you have ever seen. Big fake boobs squeezed into $500 La Perla swimsuits, voluptuous lips and not a wrinkle in sight. Hair flowing down their back, and a sassy stuck up Miami accent. English and Spanish swapped word for word, and you can understand each other somewhere in the middle. Everything is crisp, white and clean. The humidity and sweetness hang in the air and you can almost lick it off your skin. A mixture of miss universe walking around taunting men who look like sun-kissed Spartans. Home to numerous celebrities and sports stars alike, and a popular travel destination to millions year round.

miami shops

     I absolutely love the diversity in this city. You have Latinos, Cubans, Asians, Puerto Ricans, Haitians, Italians, Portuguese, Brazilians, blacks and whites. Much, if not all of these groups of people, keep and are proud of their cultural traits. Speaking their own languages, representing their own religions and traditions, cooking their own cuisine and bringing their own unique music and cultural heritages to this city. In turn, making it the ultimate melting pot. Its predominantly Spanish speaking, and some of the stop signs read “PARE.” The smells of spicy chili’s, roasted pork, basil tequila, and perfumes enamor your senses. While your ears pick up on the traffic, club promotors, jesus saves preachers, different beats of music and languages dancing around you. Miami is its own breed of beast.

The city boasts sky scrapers, palm trees and a myriad of restaurants, night clubs, shopping and activities. It is one of the cleanest and fashion forward cities in America, it truly moves to its own rhythm. Orange and lime green Lamborghinis, tight and barely there clothing, people seem to only care about looking sexy and having sex.

 liv nightclub

     I spent the day lounging at fountain bleu’s pool. We soaked in the rays while mingling into other people’s cabanas. We ate dinner at Casa Tua.. a quaint and elegantly designed Italian boutique hotel. The whole gorgeous staff spoke Italian, and were glamorously dreamy. I ate grilled lobster dandelion salad, and truffle fettuccini underneath paper lanterns. Later that night we headed to Liv night club located in our hotel. The whole atmosphere changes from day to night and the floors glow neon. The only way men get into the club is if they are buying a table (tab ran us just under $2k) and its $50 a head for females. We popped a bottle of champagne and grey goose and found some locals and Philadelphians to drink with us.  Go-go dancers, confetti and the newest and hottest beats blared through the club. The people were gorgeous but young. Ranging from 21(supposedly)-25 age group. We raved until 3 am, and wafts of marijuana and cigarette smoke took over the club.

jet ski miami

     The next morning, I popped Tylenol, chugged a Gatorade and headed to the beach to Jet Ski. I cleaned up, got my hair, nails and make up done at the spa. Where I found out Justin Bieber just checked in to celebrate his 21st birthday.

We headed to Joe’s Stone Crab for dinner. A 2 hour wait let us run down for some mango margaritas at a Mexican place called, Jalapeno. We parked our rented maserati in valet. After a quick drink and shot of tequila, we went to pay the man.. a whopping $300 bill for 45 minutes. When we were parking, he asked us if we wanted street parking and we said yes, we didn’t realize in microscopic letters, the sign read VIP $300. The Brazilian man smirked but what was my boyfriend going to do, fight the Felipe Massa look alike. Scammer alert. We headed to the restaurant and ate crab legs and pecan pie, slightly annoyed. I do have to say.. if you’re going to get scammed, it might as well be by someone beautiful. It makes it just a little bit better, you think more along the lines.. “Oh that poor beautiful bastard, they must need the money more than I do.”

I roamed around South Beach shopping and checking the place out, I came across a psychic. I rang the doorbell and headed up the stairs. I had a spirit reading, the place smelled like patchouli oil and she spoke very calm and steady. She might have been on pills, now that I think of it, but the enchanting way her words came out, was purely hypnotizing. The usual reading… “You are a woman of deep intuition and you will be be a leader in your field,” (great, which field exactly?) and sorry my dear..your love receptor is broken.” (Fantastic!) Another product she offered would open up the blockage… it’s on my to do list. After I figure out that whole career thing of course.

What I love about Miami is that everything is bright, shiny and new. The layout actually makes sense, unlike some cities I’ve traveled too. Of course any type of metropolitan city on a turquoise ocean, surrounded by a golden beach, and sprawling tropical plant life isn’t hard to take a shine to. The city is simultaneously fast-paced, loud, sexy, raunchy, bold, and booming.

The billboards are filled with fashion images and also HIV awareness. Which I think is pretty damn important in one of the horniest cities in America.  It’s health conscious, fueled by free expression and a kind of place that lets you leisurely relax or party your ass off. Underneath all the glitter of South Beach is a deeply diverse and authentic neighborhood. It’s quite possibly the best of the best of every nationality. In terms of physical attraction, rawness and sexual energy of course. Look good, feel good, and go vacation in Miami.